I was one of the first women in my field forty years ago and remained one of the only women in the field for a good twenty-five years. I get it, I really do. It's a pain in the neck to always be singled out as a novelty.
However, when someone is well-meaning, albeit clueless, and offers support in the best way he or she knows how, it is petty and self-indulgent to slap them down into an embarrassed heap, however sweet the voice used. A simple nod will suffice, a dignified, "Thank you" takes little effort, and if you need to make a point, you could add (in the sweetest possible voice, of course), "I'm not exactly a rarity."
I was one of the first women in my field forty years ago and remained one of the only women in the field for a good twenty-five years. I get it, I really do. It's a pain in the neck to always be singled out as a novelty.
However, when someone is well-meaning, albeit clueless, and offers support in the best way he or she knows how, it is petty and self-indulgent to slap them down into an embarrassed heap, however sweet the voice used. A simple nod will suffice, a dignified, "Thank you" takes little effort, and if you need to make a point, you could add (in the sweetest possible voice, of course), "I'm not exactly a rarity."