While I don't have the Jewish context, many other aspects of your post resonate with me. I miss the freedom and social context of my college years. I question my current commitments and the life I've built. I regularly struggle with wanting to go "live in a cave" and run away from the self that I've defined. I ponder who I'd be without the roles of mother and wife, and whether that self would thrive (while simultaneously knowing that I can't see myself being someone who walks away from that).

Remember that the only constant in life is Change. Situations change, feelings change, relationships change. The transition from the energy of a new relationship to the work of cohabiting and sustaining energy and concern and compassion for each other in the face of the ongoing stresses of life can certainly be a big and challenging transition. Remember that unpacking a suitcase does not bind you permanently to a situation, and reflect on what's holding you back, what you're afraid of.

The romanticism of Tu BÌ¢‰â‰ã¢Av is lovely. The realist in me wonders how frequently it worked out nearly that well. ;)

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