Leora, I feel for you. I can't imagine the humiliation of being a 13-year-old girl and having an older man inform you that you need to be wearing a tallit in order to chant Torah. I'm actually surprised that he was making this request - I would expect quite the opposite. Perhaps he didn't know how to deal with a religiously-involved teenage girl. However, this experience has stuck with you, so it's worth exploring further. I also grew up thinking that a tallit was not for me. A few years ago, my parents bought me a tallit, and occasionally - not always, sometimes -- I will wear it at shul. It's growing on me. There is something about coming in, putting on my kippah, saying the prayer, putting on my tallit - it helps me get into the mood for prayer. It also helps that plenty of other women at my shul also wear tallit (and plenty don't). But my point is: don't let what this man did many years ago control or define your relationship to Judaism. He doesn't deserve to have that power.

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