For what it's worth, I fully support my wife's career--I do everything I can to help make her successful in her line of work as she does mine (we are both academicians). However, if she said "I am a feminist" on the first date, or when we were just meeting, I would assume she was not a feminist like I am, believing in equal rights for women, and equality in the household, but instead a rabble-rousing, man-hating, unable-to-talk-about-anything-else political type of feminist.It's women's right to be that, of course--but it's also my right to take such sudden talk as a signal that I should take a walk. Better for the both of us.So before you think that feminism or working after marriage and after children are dirty words, recognize their context! Get to know one another before throwing out such a strong signal.Just a suggestion, may not be true of most.

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